Friday, June 30, 2006

That's all I can stands

I've resisted the urge to say anything until now, but looking through the last 200-odd referrals to our site from Google searches for "Chorley + Pronger," "Pronger baby," "Pronger cheats," and "Christie Chorley fucky sucky Chris Pronger," I'm about fucking sick of this all.
Bad enough the mouth breathers at oilfans, or wherever, took time out of working on their trucks and pissing into empties to actually e-mail Ms Chorley (see the comments on the Kaberle thread), and that Mirtle's post on the matter has turned into a combination gossip/relationship advice column, but the fact that this just won't die is reminding me why I stopped playing and almost stopped watching hockey in the first place: 80 percent of the people who have anything to do with would receive a serious intelligence boost by having an MBA student shit in their ears.

First, a statement of position: unlike Lyle Richardson and some of his cohorts, I fully support fans getting upset at Chris Pronger. True, he's not just a collection of pixels in NHL 06, unable to feel anything but the furious pushing of an X button, and he obviously shouldn't just be telling his "bitch" "what time it is," if that is the reason for the move. Having said that, like it or not—and I'm quite certain it has its horrific downsides—Chris Pronger does not lead a normal life. Yes, he was every right to worry about what's best for his family, and himself, and should obviously not be expected to completely sacrifice everything he may hold dear for his job, no matter how many grown men may cry based on his decision; however, due to his prodigous skill and his willingness to make a very comfortable living off that skill, other commitments come in to play. By way of analogy, no one is building an accounting department around Brian H. Reynolds, no matter how good his college marks were; not so in hockey. If Steve Jobs accepts a five-year contract from Microsoft, or David Deutsch accepts tenure at Cal Tech, and they retire/bail out after a year, with few exceptions, those organizations have a right to be pissed off at those individuals for not honouring their commitment: both organizations suffer serious blows to reputation, prestige, possibly even future performance, which just isn't the case if Brian the intern decides to find himself in Australia over the summer. Should they be pissed off? Sort of up to the individual organization. But do they have cause to get pissed off? Unless Steve Jobs just got cancer or Deutsch's wife died in a car wreck, sure; the nature of their business and the undoubtedly high recompense afforded those individuals at least gives Microsoft/Cal Tech cause to be mad at Jobs'/Deutsch's lack of foresight, if nothing else.

I don't really want to get into it further, as most things have been said, but barring a serious health risk to Pronger's family, I haven't heard any scenario that couldn't be resolved without too much muss, if both sides were willing, given the attendant factors. In so much as Pronger has choosen to ask for a trade, fans can choose to accept that or not. To put it more succintly, since my faith in the basic reading comprehension levels of hockey fans dwindles every time another Google search for Christie Chorley is made: Pronger has every right to put his family ahead of his career, fans have every right to get upset about it. There is no moral highground here, as Lyle and his detractors keep purporting: choices with consequences, that's it.

Anyway, that out of the way, the dog pile on Pronger's credibililty is pathetic. I admit, as a fan, I'm upset with Pronger's decision: with the information I have, it seems as though he's putting himself before the team (family's comfort over his commitment), and even if that decision is entirely understandable (it is), as a hopeless fan who just watched us have our best season in 16 years, it hurts to see someone tell you that flat out. That doesn't mean he's a lecher, or a child rapist, or some kind of remorseless, lady-journalist-fucking machine, though. It might just be entirely possible that he has taken a look at a situation and made a resonable if disagreeable decision, period. Right now, Edmonton fans are almost quite literally acting like the jackass in high school that gets dumped by his girlfriend and proceeds to tell everybody what a huge fucking slut she is, and that he only went out with her in the first place because she goes down faster than the '06 Flames. And being that I—increasingly grudgingly—consider myself one of you, I want all of you to stop making me look bad.

That's it: Chris Pronger didn't fuck Christie Chorley, or impregnate a 19-year-old, or ride around in a Dickie Dee bike with the cooler empty and clandestinely show his penis to toddlers when they asked for Rainbow Surprises. Fuck, even if he did, we could at least wait until someone has produced verifiable proof before coming down on the guy and whoever his mistress is. Grow up, hockey fans: the next referral to our site better be from a Google search for "Oilers + dick jokes."

Three last thoughts:

Graham Hicks' column was one of the most indescribably terrible things I've ever read. I agree with the guy's main point and I still think he's a douchebag. Not wanting to play for our hockey team is not violating "the greater good"; employing Graham Hicks might be.

This is one of the few bright spots of the whole thing.



Anonymous said...

"pronger showed pleasure motors his penis on covered in oil"

W00T!!!! how's that for a google search!! yaaaa!!! *huuh huuh* (breathing through mouth)

Anonymous said...

Please, it would take at least PhD shit to increase Oilerfan intelligence.

Swabbubba said...

There we go it all happens Tuesday. I don't think this is going to be the Mccabe type of revelation...
But I think it is funny they gave that much money to Mccabe anyway.
Which Oiler do we feed to savages next. This is the only downside to the whole firestorm started by Pronger's generally poor PR on his request. is that the fans as angry as they were, are, still are... really are making the Oil Fans look like bunch of idiots. Give the guy is due and if we don't his explanation then we can make bonfire of the posters handed out last year.

Eau de Chacin said...

That is the hottest, gayest Dockers ad never made. "Dockers - put your orbs on a cushion of velvet"

Andy Grabia said...

or ride around in a Dickie Dee bike with the cooler empty and clandestinely show his penis to toddlers when they asked for Rainbow Surprises.


Anonymous said...

Stan Weir you bastard!!!

James Mirtle said...

I don't know about you guys, but I'm deleting any reference to Chorley.

NedOwis said...

Uh, gang, it's not Chorley.

Try Kristie Gordon, City TV's Weatherhottie...

Avi Schaumberg said...

Motors: thanks for writing something about this whole mess that I can agree with.

Careless Whisper said...

To all the internet user

Hi! About Christie Chorley & Chris Pronger rumor hope all of you would REALIZE and TRUST

what I have says here. My English might not be good as before but please I would hope all of

you would satisfied and would not be mine, ok? My name is (Akira) Peter Lee, 29 yrs old. I

am living in Hong Kong right now, I am also a Canadian's too. When did I met Christie

Chorley?? I met her in Edmonton Alberta when I was 12 Yrs old we were in a same school. she

is a very nice person, because she likes to help people. At the time that I met her I

wouldn't know how to speak or even understand english well, but she teaches me. Its been 17

years we have met til now we still have good communication on the phone or even email. To

have all of you beleive me and Christie Chorley are best friend probably it might be kind of

hard. But I could have a way to approve it. When did I knew this rumor? Everyone please try

and beleive that I have knew my best friend Christie Chorley Rumor on June 29 8:20:31 am by

clicking to my own website here

chorley.html, it was a internet visitor went inside to my website and left a comments for me

to look at. Then, I know what happen, so did all of you saw a question from the visitor "Are

the rumours about Christie Chorley and Chris Pronger true" ?
Now let me answer to all of you the question if anyone would like to leave me a comments

from my website I would be appreciate.
Now let me answer to all of you the question if anyone would like to leave me a comments

from my website I would be appreciate.
About Christie Chorley & Chris Pronger rumor are 100% one hundred Percent fake!

I would appreciate your help in putting an end to my Best Friend Christie Chorley name being

linked to this situation, as it is completely WITHOUT ANY MERIT OR FACTUAL BASIS.

Any further slander or defamation can and will result in swift legal action.

Hong Kong has all kinds of the best technology and I would also help my best friend Christie

Chorley to investigate where does the rumor comes out from.

At last, Christie Chorley has already did completed her own statement from the Official
Website on June 29, 2006.
Which means Chris Pronger if you have read through the things that I type then its time for

you to come out and made out your true statement to everyone!!!

Thank you!

(Akira) Peter Lee

04/07/2006 2:50 am

Anonymous said...

Good grammar Pleasure Motors.
Nothing like using F-bombs and other colorful expletives to bring home your serious and passionate thoughts on this Pronger situation. If you have fact or proof to refute that he didn't have an affair, then you can say all you want and we will listen. Until then, go find an MBA graduate or further your own education PLEASE.
See you on the rigs...(well not actually)

Anonymous said...

100% true about Pronger knocking up a 19 year old. Ask anyone who knows Pronger or his close friends. My source is an ex-nhler who is close to a bunch of them.

This is old news in the hockey world though. Same shit happened to Jason Arnott (altough he wasn't married), Al IaFrate (When he banged Gary Leemans wife), and Lindros with Brindamour's lonely housewife.

Careless Whisper said...

O such good information that you a given me, yea my nick name is Akira not a motor (Acura)buddy. Like I say my gramma isnt good as b4, how come you are not showing your name?? You afraid of something?? I am not afraid of anything I would show my name and pic even telling the truth, well you afraid to get sue???

I have my own respect to all my friends, I wouldn't hide my name like you Anonymous. I think you should go made some more friend Anonymous. Btw, my english will gets better again soon cause I just didnt have time to come back Canada. Lets watch and see if I could find your IP. Take Care!!!!

The above comments there is nothing involve with this website user call "coveredinoil".

If there are any inconvenience, I would also like to apologize to everyone.


(Akira) Peter Lee

Anonymous said...

Any of us so unfortunate to have read this blog have had our intelligence diminished.