Saturday, October 7, 2006

One more time, you dinks

8 p.m. MT

After Thursday night's win against the Flames, our friend Dwayne, clearly euphoric (and presumably drunk) with the buzz of having just watched his first hockey game in three months, was heard to remark, "You know, I don't think they're going to lose all year."

A bold prognosis, perhaps — but a victory tonight will bring us one step closer to his dream of a perfect 82-0-0 Oilers season. The Globe and Mail's sports department might want to get a head start on busting off the same gas valves in the office they had spun wide open last December when they ran that lead story asking if the Sens were not "THE BEST TEAM EVER?" (Postscript: It turns out they weren't.) I'd link to the story, but I'm not dumb/50-years-old enough to register to pay for access to online news content.

Anyhow, let's kick a little more ass again tonight, this time in front all six "Sea of Red" members who didn't shrug their shoulders and drive the Canyonero down to Sport Chek to return their still-creased home jerseys after their beloved Flames failed to give them something to show their tits about beyond April.

I'll one-up BoA and say 5-1 Oilers win, with goals by Thoreson, Sykora, Moreau, Smyth and Bergeron. Kipper can't own us forever.

• In case you missed it, the recently crowned 2006 Hot-Off Champion was just, not coincidentally, signed to a four-year contract extension for terms undisclosed. Over-long, perhaps, but Moreau is a protypical hard-working Oilers forward. Lowe continues to reward the core.

• The Maple Leafs continued to cause their fans to contort themselves in knots trying to justify JFJ's logic by signing barely useful career fourth-liner Boyd Devereaux to a one-year, two-way contract. At least this speedy former Oiler draft actually seems like a Maurice-type forward, I guess.

• TB and Dave have finally moved into the 21st century by bringing their insightful and witty column, In The Box, online. If you hate computers, ITB also runs every Thursday in my old stomping/complaining grounds, Edmonton news and arts mag Vue Weekly.


Andy Grabia said...

I'll add another to your goal, sir. Let's make it 6-1, Oilers. Pisan (2), Lupul, Torres, Smytty, and Horcoff.

Jim said...

I'll see your six and raise it to 8-1 Oilers: Hemsky, Smyth (2), Sykora, Pisani (2), Lupul, and Torres. YEAH. Hemsky also gets three assists.

Julian said...

8-1 isn't anything to get excited about compared to a 8-0 shutout effort by both Roli and the much maligned D-men.

Oh, and Kipper getting chased after three weak goals, McLennan coming in and getting chased as well for Kipper to come back and be embarassed by a two on oh between Hemsky and Sykora after Phaneuf trips over a broken stick.

Prus said...

Hubris thy name is Oilfan. ;)

Nothin' better than watching a Flames-Oilers game from the 200 level of the Dome....except watching it from the Sport Check zone.

Anonymous said...

Sweet Canyonero reference. If such a thing ever existed, I'd expect to see it on the Deerfoot.

Pleasure Motors said...

Hubris thy name is Oilfan

Bold statement from a guy who's team is one knee ligament from racing towards the first overall pick.

On that note: anyone in the Northwest division want to sacrifice a 500k player to pretty much immediately make their team about 10 points better?

Prus said...

I didn't predict a 5-1 or 8-1 win for the Flames so that doesn't apply here PM. The only prediction i made about the back-to-back games was that the teams would split them. Turns out i was right.

Also, take rollover out of the Oilers net and things would be about the same for the Oilers. Espically with MAyBe always a threat to amputate his own netminders.

Dave said...

Best/dumbest proclamation by an announcer during last night's game:

"Sometimes your stick explodes at the wrong time."

So what would be the right time? When you've made a bomb out of composite hockey sticks?

daniel said...

So what would be the right time? When you've made a bomb out of composite hockey sticks?

When you're throwing it at a terrorist, of course.

Anonymous said...

Daniel that was just gold haha.

Ryan said...

Moreau, while a good player, I think was overpaid with that extension.

The she-devils of Hot-Oil are surely to blame.

Anonymous said...

"over-long, perhaps..."

-I think that's what won him the title in the first place ;)

Coluch said...


"Kings rookie Anze Kopitar seems too good to be true. The 19 year-old has a long reach, is strong on his skates and blessed with fine offensive instincts. He cruised right past Ducks D Chris Pronger to score his first NHL goal and could very well be a Calder Trophy candidate."

I love Pronger's part in that career milestone.