Tuesday, February 6, 2007

Oiler-related Story Roundup

A gander at TSN's front page at about 4pm MST brought some surprise: all three top stories have a wonderful little Oiler connection.

First things first: Sergei Samsonov wants the
hell out of Montréal. And apparently the Habs want fairly little to do with him, too, putting him on waivers just a little while ago, kind of a weird move, considering he's been mentioned in trade talks semi-frequently, and you have to figure someone else out there would be willing to take a chance on a guy who's been good for about 50 points a year since he came into the league (though maybe $3.525 million says no one picks him up). Having said that, from watching Samsonov play here, I'm fairly surprised he was ever good for that: I guess he did get 16 in 19 games, plus a few important ones in the playoffs, but he struck me as an uncommonly smooth garbage-point getter: he barely ever created anything for himself, relying mostly on slipping into holes others created for him, though he seemed to have a decent amount of trouble even finding those, particularly as the playoffs wore on. You'd have thought the new rules would have helped him, too, but maybe nagging injuries affected his timing. I'm willing to bet he'd probably do alright if some team was for some reason willing to put him on a top line again (hey Vanouver, still need somebody to play with the Sedins?), and I suspect he'll get at least a few more years and one more slightly overpaid contract to try and prove that.

Far more interesting is the news that Mark Messier is apparently staking out the GM job for himself in New York. Guess that Oiler spirit really does run in the blood: you're allowed to just walk up to any team you used to play for and get key front office positions with little to no experience, right? I have absolutely no idea how Messier would do as a GM, but as a guess off the top of my head, I'd say terrible. As a coach, maybe, even though we all know his so-called "leadership" meant precisely nothing after 1994, but I don't think Mess was ever particularly noted for his on-ice smarts, never mind off-ice ones, and as I recall one of his coaching/GM idols was Mike Keenan, who I'm still convinced was only an NHL executive because of some kind of NHL affirmative action program for morons. Having said that, it's not like Mess would be the first former all-star to succeed wildly in the front office.

The last one was that Vernon's number is being retired. Mudcrutch has a great take on it at his Score blog that you should read.

Oh yeah, we're playing Vancouver tonight, too. I'd talk about it, but I really don't want to bring up painful thoughts. Before I go, though, here's a fun fact about the goaltenders the Oilers face so often: in the Northwest division, precisely one team has a starting goaltender with a LIFETIME save percentage of less than .913: Colorado. Fernandez is .913, and both Kipper and Luongo are .919 (Kipper is actually .925, if you only count his time in Calgary). This means, roughly, that for more than one quarter of the games we play in any given year, odds are we will not even score on ONE IN TEN shots. Put another way: we should give up trying to improve our offence and just make sure people can't score on us, because we're never going to score on them. I hate our division.

Prediction: 9-1 Oilers. Smyth, Horcoff and Hemsky all get hat tricks. GOILERS!!!!


mike w said...

Man, what the hell happened to Samsonov?

mike w said...


Matt Cooke is a human piece of cowardly garbage.

Dan the Wainwright Oiler Fan said...

Affirmative action for morons... that's rich. That would also explain the presence in the NHL of:

Sean Avery
Jeremy Roenick
Donald Brashear
Derek Boogard
honorable mention: Darcy Tucker

mike w said...

Damn Oilers.

Temujin said...


Sedins with nine points!

Cooke with zero penalty minutes.

Torres was a -1 and had 14 penalty minutes.

The best Oiler player tonight was Zack Stortini.

That last point really makes me smile. Muahahaha!

Anonymous said...

That's just cruel. The Sedins were good though...

Mike The Sieve said...

I don't see what's so cowardly about Matt Cooke. You can go after him all you want, he'll take it, and then he'll still knock your block off on the next shift.

And you'll end up with the penalty. Maybe even two men down. Twice. Right, Raffi?

Just because he won't give you the satisfaction of fighting him doesn't mean he's afraid of you.

Besides, as the aptly nicknamed Chicken Parm said last night, it's incredibly effective.

Admit it, you'd love to have Cooke on your team. Tell me you wouldn't take Cooke over that fucktard Torres.

Eyeris said...

Man, with this depressingly steep downward trajectory, I'm not sure if I should go to the Oilers game next Tuesday. On one hand, the Oil is sucking; on the other hand, so are the Bruins.

Basically, I'm trying to figure out whether the lure of John “Chief” Bucyk figurines to the first 10 000 fans is enough of an incentive to subject myself to the abject agony.

Elly said...

From the reports on espn, it sounds like Messier didn't check with the current Rangers' GM about a career move.

Games like that hurt to watch. Maybe the Oilers are just trying to set themselves up for a heroic comeback that will shock and amaze everyone?

Eyeris: Think of it this way: at least they both can't lose. That was my deciding thought in buying tickets.

Pleasure Motors said...

Tell me you wouldn't take Cooke over that fucktard Torres.

I'm no great fan of Torres, but the only way I want Cooke is dead.

Mike The Sieve said...

"the only way I want Cooke is dead."

Dead? Jeez!

Such anger. I don't know you or anything, but from your Hot Off entries I assumed you were much more gentle than that.

'nuther andy said...

Did you see Torres on the bench under the obvious camera glare in the 3rd right after the Sedins went up by two? It was priceless. He looked all (cloud bubble overhead) "fuckin' assholes prob'ly talking like it's my fault we lose again. OK, look cool, look intense. Messier. Good pose. Fuck, if their guys weren't always taking the puck I'd have time to do some shit. Coach is the guy putting me out there, it's not my fault. Yeah, that's right. Oops, don't look at the camera, dummy."

It was pathetically hilarious.

case said...

0 cups. not one.