Tuesday, March 6, 2007

This just in: Ryan Smyth still an Islander

Just in case you hadn't heard. After all, it's not like there's been a lot of press about this lately.

Look at all these former Oilers and their smiling faces. Do you think they ever get together and reminisce about the old days back in Browntown? Partying with 17-year-olds at The Standard? Red-eye breakfasts at Keegans? Trinket shopping with the guys at When Pigs Fly? That time Jason Smith was trying to convince everyone that the laughably misguided Gehry ripoff that is the renovation plan for the Art Gallery of Alberta was actually quite tasteful, and then strangled a panhandler to death in the middle of Churchill when everyone laughed at him?

Yeah, probably not. They're all too busy "getting points" and "winning" and "possibly getting into the playoffs."

Meanwhile, our abandoned crap-sack of an AHL team is getting ready to play the Tampa Bay Lightning tomorrow night. Call me crazy, but I just don't think I'm down with watching Vincent Lecavalier skate lazy circles around a wide-eyed Ladislav Smid.

I'm not used to this sense of futility. Even in those years we were out of the playoffs, we still kept our slim post-season hopes alive until the final week of the season. To give up this early, is just... sad. And if management and the team has already thrown in the towel, what's left for the fans to hold on to? What consolation victories can we claim from now until we pat down the last shovelful of dirt on this comically tragic season? What are we supposed to cheer for?

And who's watching anymore? I'm keen to know.

PS: Consecutive Smyth-related posts on CinO now at 16 and counting. Tyler's got some catching up to do.


Clark said...

I'll tell you what you should do. Get mad at the team, don't resign yourself to cheering for mediocrity! Tell the brass how mad you are!

Go to www.bring94home.com and let 'em have it

Chris! said...

We appreciate the effort, Clark, but I sincerely doubt Smyth will ever play in an Oilers uniform again. And anyhow, this team's problems run deeper than that.

swabbubba said...

As a long time Oiler fan. One thing this team needs to do for the rest of the season is just lose. Hell it will improve out draft pick. The Oilers have never had real high pick we always on the outside looking in on the Ovechin's Crosby's. You get the idea.
Close only counts horseshoes and small thermal nuclear devices... Would the city implode if they went hunting for the #1 pick next year.
Just me being bitter, if futility is our game can we not shit the bed like champs

Anonymous said...

Wow, I'm sure there are a lot of fans wishing we hadn't gotten rid of Poti or Bergeron after seeing this picture. Of course, these are the same fans who still wish we hadn't lost Anson Carter, Mike York, Hometown boy Brad Isbister, Chad Kilger, Dominic Pittis, Christian Laflamme, Kent Manderville and Len Esau.

Are they insane? Yes.

Black Dog said...

We got rid of Len Esau?

The one true scary thing - MAB has almost as many points playing for the Islanders already as the present highest scoring Dman on the Oilers has from the entire season.

Julian said...

In the Isles game before the one last night (or whenever, the time change still confuses me) all three stars were ex-oilers, Smyth, Satan and MAB.

Aside : this blog proves misery loves company.

DTK said...

I'm still watching. I want them to win in Ana and take the last two remaining games vs the Dys and Flames, as to fuck up those teams chances at HIA come the playoffs. And to that end I hope the Wild take us out in the last three games.

As for the rest? I couldn't give a fuck. I hope Horc does well because he's the next to be dealt and I don't want to see his value plummet. It would be nice to see JFJ show me something because it seems like it's just me and his parents left who think this kid has a shot or a clue. MP's a likeable guy as well.

BUT for all those guys that want a high draft pick then here's how it feels to lose every night.

I hope you enjoy it because the '08 class is supposed to be a strong draft as well

Andy Grabia said...

I watched a bit of the 3rd on Saturday night, but was pretty much cheering for Calgary to win. I didn't actually cheer mind, you, but not yelling about how much I hate them for an hour is pretty much the same thing.

I don't plan on watching the Oilers again this season unless Schremp gets called up. Next year? Who knows. I may just turn into Tom Benjamin and write a blog about how much I hate the Oilers.

LittleFury said...

Isn't it just so...Oilers that the first year in God-knows-how-long that they have a crack at a top 10 draft puck is also the weakest draft year in recent memory. This team can't even tank properly.

And Andy, don't turn into Benjamin: there's one too many as it is.

Black Dog said...

I watched a bit of Saturday's game but I see few of them anyway. I'll still follow them when I can. Want to see how the kids do.

And while its supposed to be a weak draft I'd say the Oilers will be in position to get a very good young player. There are enough of them that will be available. I was reading about some of the draft eligible guys and there are some good looking kids there.

James Mirtle said...

This blog should temporarily be named Covered in Smyth

But given that classic porn of the same name, watch the copyright violation.

grace said...


A friend photoshopped the pic for me.

*crying still*

I would like to be covered in smyth. So yeah, it's a bit pornish.

Actually, even coveredinoil could have certain connotations.

MikeP said...

"Even in those years we were out of the playoffs, we still kept our slim post-season hopes alive until the final week of the season."

You didn't watch much hockey in 1993-96, did you? Let me remind you.

1993: 26-50-8, with Petr Klima leading the team in scoring - 48 points in 68 games. Shayne Corson was captain and Bill Ranford's GAA was 3.84 with a .884SP.

1994: 25-45-14, good for dead last in the Pacific. Well, the Jets and Senators were worse. Weight had a decent year with 74 points in 84 games though, and Arnott almost won the Calder. Shayne Corson was still captain though. Ranford improved, at least.

1995: 17-27-4. Well, they beat out the Mighty Ducks, at least.

1996: 30-44-8. Weight's 104 point year, and Arnott, Ciger, and Czerkawski were pretty good too. Smytty? Not so much, 11 points in 48 games, too bad he only saw his own end when they had the short change.

OK, I wasn't watching much hockey then either, but I lived in New Brunswick and there was no such thing as Centre Ice.

All this is just a long-winded way of saying that despite his identical complaints about financial situations, Lowe's record is still miles better than Glen Sather's in his last few years in Oiltown. Yeah, this is the first time in a while that the Oilers' playoff hopes were ended in February, but it wasn't so long ago that they were done in December, either.

That being said, I hated the realization that they were sunk too, and Lowe has to accept a certain amount of blame for that situation. When a team screws up, the boss is *always* wrong, even if it's not his fault - and in this case, it's not the blue line's fault they're playing like a bunch of guys who are still on the sunny side of 25.

pt said...

Maybe you guys should be Islander fans. How long are you going to cry about Ryan Smyth? He's not fucking coming back, so it's a fruitless effort anyway.

Chris! said...

pt, you're obviously too stupid to be reading this blog.

Anonymous said...

Klowe can still redeem himself if he does some good moves/signings this summer. I'm mad about Smyth leaving too, but I'm going to give him a chance.

Anonymous said...

Chris!, you gotta idiot filter you can put on this blog to weed out ppl like pt?

Anonymous said...

St.L. vs Cgy

Dvorak from Brewer.


Tune in next week when some team will pull
Selivanov from Beers and Dollas out of it's ass.

Anonymous said...

Tune in next week when some team will pull Selivanov from Beers and Dollas out of it's ass.

Yeah. The Oilers.

mike w said...

Of course, I wikipedied Bose-Einstein Condensate.

Art Vandelay said...

According to Jason Gregor on the Team 1040 in Vancouver today, everybody in Edmonton has come around to realize what a genius Lowe is.

Vic Ferrari said...

Dennis said:

I hope Horc does well because he's the next to be dealt and I don't want to see his value plummet.

Oh man, Dennis, that would be worth it just to see MacTavish's reaction afterward. He looked close to capping himself when he heard that Smyth was gone, trading 10 might be the final straw. :D

Anonymous said...

Well, the oil is alive and well in NYI. I refuse to cheer for Calgary, so Vancouver gets my support. Just can't like Lowe's team anymore. (NOT the oilers. Lowe's team.)

Vic Ferrari said...

When are Oiler fans going to accept that they are lucky just to have a team?

The ownership (37 regular working men I might add) are losing tens of millions every year just trying to keep NHL hockey in good ol' ourtown for the sake of the community. Especially the children.

On top of that Lowe was one of the 'boys on the bus' from the GLORY DAYS (TM). How dare you criticize any of his decisions, mike w. For shame, sir.

It's time to take off your thinking caps, Oiler fans. Buy a Smid jersey now, before he's a superstar! And if you can't watch all the games, at least catch the pay per view events.

And remember to root, root, root for the home team!

Smyth was just a glorified plugger riding Lupul's coattails for Chrissakes. Trust Lowe's judgment, he's more like Billy Bean than you realize!

Now take your half empty glass and get the hell out of my sight.

mike w said...

ha ha. That's not even a parody so much as a transcription from the HF Boards.

twain said...

Guys, it has been 24 hours and no smytty post. Everything all right? If you are still there, don't do anything drastic.

Smyth to the Isle
Covered in oil weeps
Can these three live on?

Anonymous said...

He doesn't look that weird in an Islanders uniform. Even when I heard he'd gone to the Islanders, I thought "oh, well, that's not that weird I guess."

-Jacques Chirac

Anonymous said...

You oilers fans are better off without Smyth. Thats always been your problem, you pin superstar labels on players that are good 2nd liners. Hemsky is another example, trade for someone with the true stats of a superstar, and your team will start to flourish. Smyth is not worth 2x's more than Tucker!!! Also, get a real goalie, Roloson is shoddy and not reliable enough to play in the NW.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous: you make me sick when you speak. All of you.


Chris! said...

Why are anonymous posters so completely retarded?

Temujin said...

You didn't watch much hockey in 1993-96, did you? Let me remind you.

Those were good years for Canuck fans, and you are all now welcome aboard the bandwagon. Get your seats now... they'll be near the back of the bus where the exit is conveniently located. Beware of the charging hordes that have more experience jumping off the wagon. They are relentless, and if we tank in the first round you will want to flee quickly before the masses overtake you.

That video is positively disturbing, by the way. I need an eye flush for crying out loud, and I am quite certain that horrific song will be in my head for the rest of the night.

MikeP said...

Temujin, my second favourite team always used to be the Canucks (I liked Smyl, Gradin, and Tanti, to show my age a bit) but I just don't have the energy nowadays for more than one team. I briefly considered the Rangers when I had Centre Ice and was thinking I needed an Eastern team to follow as well - if only so I could catch a "favourite" team and still get to bed at a decent hour - but sanity prevailed.

At least I'm no longer in the Atlantic time zone.

mike w said...

By the way, Darcy Tucker is THE MOST OVERRATED PLAYER in the universe. What is he, minus a million? How many goals are trash on the PP?