Thursday, October 18, 2007

Time to snap this losing streak into a Slim Jim

Okay seriously, now we get to see how bad this Oilers team might be. Shane Doan is Phoenix's leading scorer with 4 points and pretty much the only "marquee" player amongst the Coyotes' forward ranks. Apparently Doan is complemented on the first line by some new turd named Daniel Carcillo, who is described as the "next Sean Avery" and being "very limited" in "offensive ability" by TSN (good thing he's leading the charge) along with the aging, oft-injured centre Steven Reinprecht. To give you a a little perspective on Phoenix's forward corps, here's a little piece of info jazz: no player has ever produced more than fifty points, except for Reinprecht and Mike York a long, long time ago.

The defence is better with Ed Jovanovksi, Derek Morris, Keith Ballard, and uh, I guess Nick Boynton, but the Coyotes goaltending is anything but stable with David Aebischer, Alex Auld and Mikael Tellqvist all duking it out for 1A status. If the Oilers are ever going to catch a break facing a goalie that isn't Roberto Luongo, it's against this team (please note: all of these goalies have enough experience in the NHL to avoid the dreaded "Stempniaked" curse).

So yeah. It's been twelve long days since the Oilers have served up a victory, which makes this a an absolute must-win... um, because I say so?

PS: With almost a week off, the Oilers have been on a get-to-know-you steak and golf retreat in Arizona, which hopefully pays off. If anyone can get past the opaque, stony-faced countenance of Joni Pitkanen, it has to be the gregarious and affable Marty Reasoner, who's always up for a good heart-to-heart over protein shakes, perhaps after a good game of hackeysack in the hotel parking lot.

20 comments:

sacamano said...

Yeah, I always thought that the definition of Stempniaked should include a stipulation that the player on the sub-standard team had to be an unknown quantity.

I mean, sure, Blues fans might have known about him, but honestly, the beautiful thing about the original Stempniaking was looking at the box score and saying:

"Bwa ha! The Flames lost to the Blues! And some guy named 'Stempniak' lit them up -- who the fuck is Stempniak?"

mc79hockey said...

Ed Jovanovksi, Derek Morris, Keith Ballard, and uh, I guess Nick Boynton

Zbynek Michalek is disappointed in you.

mike w said...

He's injured!

Nice crowd of 967 over at Jobing.com Arena tonight, huh?

mike w said...

TOOOORRRRRREEEEESSS

mike w said...

There's that one-shot scorer from 2 years ago!

sacamano said...

Quick, trade him. His stock is never going to get higher than when he is on a streak.

mike w said...

Re: annoying commercials

Okay, who seriously wants to actually get in the Coors Lite Mansion? 12-year olds?

LittleFury said...

Tell me Matt "Morgentaler" Greene wasn't on the ice for that PHO PP.

mike w said...

Um.... quick look over there! [points to a puppy]

LittleFury said...

Jesus. This isn't a team, it's a conceptual art piece.

Darien said...

*gasp* they might actually beat Phoenix!

LittleFury said...

shhhhhhhh!!!!!!

LittleFury said...

COOOGGGGGGGHEMMMMMMMTTTOOORRESSS!!!!!

Rock Deputy said...

EEEEEEEEMMMMMPTYYYYYY NEEEEEEEETTTT!

Stan the Caddy said...

Ok, caught the HD feed from FoxSports tonight. Why does Darren Pang always have to interject in the middle of the play like he's just gotten over a serious constipation?

At least he had some nice words for Ray's wife, Cammy. On a side note, is there a better colour guy in the league than Ferraro?

I had no idea how dire the situation in Phoenix was until tonight. I'd be hard pressed to believe they had more than 6,000 tonight. Pretty soon, the Jets fans are actually going to outnumber the local Phoenixians(?)

Winning streak to come?

Darien said...

Hrm... ix-nay on the inning-way treak-skay if you look at next week.5

But yeah... Phoenix. Forget Jets fans, soon the roster will outnumber arena attendance.

garnet said...

Do the Coyotes really play -- or take to the ice, anyhow -- at the Jobing.com arena? Did they really mean to sell the naming rights to a website whose monicker evokes vague Biblical memories of great losses and epic suffering?

Pleasure Motors said...

Winning streak to come?

Though I'm happy for the win, giving up 41 shots to Phoenix does not make me feel like there is an impending winning streak.

Doogie said...

I never thought of it that way, Garnet. I just think it's the worst fucking arena name in the NHL. But don't get me started on corporate sponsorship of arenas. Remember when they tried to sell the naming rights to Mark Messier Arena in St. Albert last year? Yeah.

I still call the arena in Edmonton Northlands Coliseum half the time. "Skyreach Centre" and "Rexall Place" are just dumb.

Anonymous said...

I hate corporate sponsorship, especially when the company goes bankrupt and the name has to be changed (Enron Field). There were a couple of baseball announcers that consistently referred to Candlestick Park as "Commercialstick Park" after the name was sold to corporate sponsors.

I'm surprised they never seemed to get called on it. They must have had good blackmail pictures.