Monday, June 9, 2008

CTV: eat dinks!

So, it appears that CTV has gone ahead and bought the rights to "The Hockey Song" up until this point known (and only known) as the theme to Hockey Night in Canada. CTV Spokesman Rick Brace had this to say:

"It is an iconic tune, embraced by Canadians everywhere, and we felt it was imperative to save it." (Emphasis mine)

Right, of course: gigantic media conglomerations are always worried about preserving national icons. Thank you, Rick Brace, and thank the good folks at CTV for giving in to the demands of a borderline extortionist who is evidently labouring under the impression that "jingle writer" is anything other than a pseudonym for "failed musician."

Sorry, but the all this stuff about it being some great iconic tune is pure BS: it's a half-decent jingle that is famous entirely because it was attached to one of the (if not the) most iconic television programs in Canadian history. I think it's probably fair to say Hockey Night in Canada doesn't occupy the place it used to in Canadian culture, but it's still fairly obvious that nobody would remember "badabadabaDA" if it wasn't preceding Saturday night Maple Leafs games for 40 years.

That CTV has now used it to throw some sand in the face of the CBC, under the guise of "saving" it for Canadians, goes beyond stupid. It's a big, rich corporation throwing its weight around at the expense of a public broadcaster, and nothing more. And it sure as hell won't change the fact the their hockey panel is a collection of mouth-breathing imbeciles too stupid to explain how to properly play with themselves, never mind the game of hockey.



LittleFury said...

I hear CTV is gonna re-record it for its TSN broadcasts. Instead of the old-fashioned orchestral pomp, the theme will be screamed by Pierre MacGuire.

Rock Deputy said...

Apparently, CBC will be holding a contest for fans to write the new HNIC jingle, with a prize of $100,000.

Eyeris said...

When I first read the memo, I'm like, CBC is retarded. HNIC is pretty much the ONLY program on the channel that makes money and I can't believe they're messing with the ONE good thing they have. (Have you seen Heartland? Horrible!) But then, consider how that jingle costs 3 million, the Corp probably can't spend that kind of money without some public flogging either.

Anyway, if I'm with CTV marketing, my most brilliant move would be to gift this back to the CBC. Maybe attach it with a condition, say they have to refer to the CTV everytime or something. BUT, CTV gets to be the group that "saved" the theme song, give a perpetual "fuck you" to the Corp, have your competition basically run an ad for you every weekend, and look like the good guys there. 3 million really isn't much to spend for a national marketing campaign this size. It probably cost just as much to have the CTV billboards up in the construction site across CBC Toronto.

Iffy said...

That is a brilliant logo. Kudos.

Tyler said...

I'd rather they played with their toys than played with themselves.

Jonathan said...

it sure as hell won't change the fact the their hockey panel is a collection of mouth-breathing imbeciles too stupid to explain how to properly play with themselves, never mind the game of hockey.

Sorry, but as much as I agree that the song has been overrated (hello, Denis Coderre), you're wrong about the hockey panel. Bob McKenzie is far and away the best in the business, Milbury has been extremely entertaining, and they always add whichever coach/GM is out of work this month.

Does CBC even have a hockey panel? P.J. Stock? Don Cherry?

mike w said...

Indeed, TSN has made strides in the last ten years and seems to have the better product, without the cache or brand power of HNIC. Plus, I don't actually hate Pierre McGuire.

After Ron MacLean, the cupboard feels pretty bare when it comes to on-air talent that will be able to carry the show in the future.

I have to disagree with Jonathan and say that Milbury is simply more annoying than entertaining. TSN should be moving away from that manufactured gameshow bluster you see sometimes on ESPN or sports radio.

strummer said...

Call me crazy, but I'd rather watch Ron MacLean and Scott Oake make fun of Kelly Hrudey than watch Pierre "STROONNGGG LEGGGS" MacGuire chew up valuable air-time that would be better put to use airing 24/7 abortions.

A late saturday-night Oilers game on HNIC, with Jim Hughson and after-hours with Dwayne "stop-harassing-mah-chil-en" Roloson... It just doesn't get any better.

Scarlett said...

TSN is going down faster than a hooker. They seem more intent on screaming nonsensical sound bites than actually analyzing a hockey game.

Sean said...

I'm not sure why you seem to care so much and are so angry about this. As you pointed out, it's just a half-decent jingle. I don't know why you feel the need to mock the composer if someone is willing to pay for it.

Lord Bob said...

TSN is basically ESPN Canada, so that explains the uselessness of their commentators.

Also, as a taxpayer, I'm not sure I'd like to pay for the ransom of some woman who happened to strike gold decades ago because her one accomplishment in life preceded the Leafs game. I have to admit, I think I'd be against that.

DMFB said...

I don't know why you feel the need to mock the composer if someone is willing to pay for it.

Because she decided to fuck over the people who are the only reason she could get $3 million for it in the first place. That is why I mocked her. She can dry the tears with $20 bills.

uni said...

$20 bills are for those losers who get $500 per airing of their 30 seconds or less jingles.

$3 million ransomers dry their tears with $100 bills.

Also I can't blame her for squeezing every last cent she could out of it; and I can't fault the CBC for not caving to her demands cause I would have balked at that.

All in all no one is to 'blame', but I certainly feel no sympathy or joy for "the composer".

Doogie said...

CTV's clearly trying to buy a piece of the cachet that HNIC has traditionally carried. It won't work, because you can't buy tradition any more than you can buy faith or love. But good on them for trying, I guess, and for at least scoring the apparent PR victory (spooging victory announcements notwithstanding) over the CBC.

grease trap said...


You're just telling me this now?!


Doogie said...


Clearly you're not familiar with the works of the great philosopher Lennon. Of course, this theory clashes somewhat with his later postulation that "all you need is love," since it completely ignores the most basic of needs in Maslow's heirarchy, including food, water, air, and shelter -- the latter of which was somewhat esoterically discussed by his rival Jagger years later -- and therefore love must bear some monetary value in order to account for this.

From this, my own belief is that you probably can't buy "love," as the poets know it, but you can probably buy a night of decent sex if you know where to look.